Scent-A-Mental Memories

I've been inspired to write about Pepe Le Pew and his kitty cat girlfriend, Penelope. Penelope mistakenly went under a freshly painted chair and got white paint on her back. From that point on she was the object of Pepe's affections.

"Eenie, meenie, miney, mo. Catch a lover by the toe. If she holler hold her closer. Eenie, meeine, miney mosa." ~Pepe Le Pew

For an enjoyable venture into some of Pepe's antics, check out this YouTube video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEdBndu0YUM

Ode de Skunk

Peeyouie! I ran over a dead skunk in the middle of the road and brought the odor home on the truck tires. Needless to say, my neighbors aren't too happy with me.

I had just taken a hot steamy shower topped off with some expensive French perfume I received for my birthday, thinking I was "hot stuff". While driving home from the grocery store, I decided to listen to some jazz tunes on the truck stereo. Never paying too much attention to what is squashed into the pavement, I kept my eyes ahead and realized there was a bad odor emitting from the underside of my truck. 'Oh no,' I thought,'It smells like a polecat!' (referred to as a skunk in these parts). Ode de skunk overpowerd whatever "sweet smell" I was wearing.

The skunk stench lingered for the rest of the day. My next door neighbor came home from work and said in a load voice, I could hear through closed windows, "What the hell is that awful smell. It reeks of dead skunk!"

My neighbors are great, but now they look at me with a great deal of skepticism. All I can tell them is expensive French perfume is no match for ode de skunk. Even Bear cat won't go near the truck.

Fall Glow

It was a dank, dark, dreary day yesterday, but I woke up to the glow of this magnificent maple tree against a cloudless blue sky this morning.

I immediately grabbed my Kodak digital camera that was hanging on the doorknob, in the hallway, and went outside.

I took the picture to the left, looking up from the base of the tree. It captures the Fall glow that weaves its magic this time of year.

For me, it symbolizes hope and renewal of the human spirit as the beauty of life unfolds after the dark clouds clear.

To all those Horse Pucky readers who have supported Jon and I through our cloudy days, thank you. You know who you, you know why, and you are loved.

Save on Taxes and Health Care Reform

All right, all ready! Let's get going on saving taxes and all this health care reform hooey. I agree with Grayson's take on the Republican philosophy. Don't get sick and die quick.

My favorite idea comes from A Modest Proposal by Jonathon Swift circa 1729. It's a satirical article stating that children should be used as food. They are both nutritious and delicious stewed, baked, roasted, or boiled. That will take care of all the juvenile delinquents in our school system, which is already overburdened with an abundance of services for the "darlings" at the taxpayers expense.

For those of us who never get sick; we should be mailed a yearly wellness incentive check. Let's see now, that equates to $152.40 per month, which I pay out of pocket times 12 months equals $1,828.80 per year.

Let's get going folks. We can learn from the past and hope for the future. We can save on taxes and health care reform at the same time.

Fat Removal

Three weeks ago I had to have a fatty tumor removed from above my right eyebrow. It was nothing serious and turned out to be benign. The plastic surgeon gave me a shot of novacaine, lidocaine, and some other muscle relaxant that made me want to snooze for hours after surgery. Too bad I couldn't sleep during surgery. I was wide awake while Dr. O'Connor explained the whole procedure as he carefully made the first incision.

His first comment was, "Does it hurt?" And I said, "I thought that's what the novacaine plus was for; and no it doesn't hurt!" Then he gave me his good news bad news report during surgery. The good news was it indeed was a fatty tumor, nothing unusual. The bad news was it went deep and wrapped around a facial nerve and a muscle. 'Oh great,' I thought. So I asked him, "What does that mean?" "It means we have to go deeper than I thought and I'm not sure the novacaine plus will cover that."

I gritted my teeth, sat on my hands so I wouldn't lose control, and said three Hail Marys. The worse that happened pain-wise was a slight pinching feeling when he cut into the muscle. After that it was a serene experience. That injection he gave me had something in it besides novacaine. I was ecstatically happy for 24 hours...until the injected coctail wore off.

The lump is gone from my forehead. The incision is healing. Now I have to figure out how to get Dr. O'Connor to remove the rest of the fat from my body. Then I'll be really happy.